But now he is dead, why should I fast? can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.
Read Chapter 12
Ambrose of Milan
AD 397
Holy David lost two sons. One was guilty of incest, the other of fratricide. To have had them caused him shame; to have lost them brought him grief. He also lost a third, a child whom he loved. He wept over him while he was still alive, but he did not long for him after he died. For so we read that when the boy fell sick, David besought the Lord for him and fasted and lay upon sackcloth, and, although the elders approached him and tried to make him get up from the ground, he resolved neither to rise nor to eat. After he learned that the boy was dead, however, he arose from the ground, bathed upon the spot, anointed himself, changed clothing, worshiped the Lord and took food. Since this seemed strange to his servants, he answered that while the child was still alive, he had rightly fasted and wept, because he justly thought that God might pity him and was certain that he who could restore the dead to life could surely preserve the life of one still living. But now that the child was dea...
Thus David wept for his son who was about to die; he did not grieve for him when dead. He wept that he might not be snatched from him, but he ceased to weep when he was snatched away, for he knew that he was with Christ. And that you may know what I declare is true, he wept for his incestuous son Amnon when he was killed, and he mourned for the parricide Absalom when he perished, saying, “My son Absalom, my son Absalom!” He did not think the innocent son should be mourned, because he believed that the others had perished for their crime but that the latter would live on account of his innocence.
Therefore, you have no reason for grieving excessively over your brother. He was born a man, he was subject to human frailty. - "Consolation on the Death of Emperor Valentinian 47.48"
King David loved his child and sat indeed in sackcloth and ashes, but he neither brought soothsayers nor enchanters (although there were such then, as Saul shows), but he made supplication to God. So you should do likewise: as that just man did, so you should do also; the same words you should say, when your child is dead, “I shall go to him, but he will not come to me.” This is true wisdom, this is affection. However much you may love your child, you will not love so much as he had then. For even though his child was born of adultery, yet that blessed man’s love of the mother was at its height, and you know that the offspring shares the love of the parents. And so great was his love toward it, that he even wished it to live, though it would be his own accuser, but still he gave thanks to God. - "Homilies on Colossians 9"
